Finishing Today

Today is not such an easy day to write a blog as I sent what we will call a finished manuscript to my agent this morning. It is not so easy to write a blog when your mind is elsewhere no matter how kindly you have asked it to stay here with you. Off it goes in search of what it has never found, tomorrow remaining perpetually a day ahead of my mind and me. I got a headache earlier today trying to see into the future. Then my heater blew and the present became so cold I absolutely couldn’t ignore it. Now a new heater’s on the way—but that’s tomorrow. In the meantime I am absolutely surrounded by today. It’s everywhere. It won’t go away or hurry up. And it is completely indifferent about tomorrow. I say, “Look, could you just step aside for a moment? You are completely blocking my view.”

“I could,” it says. “But I’m larger that you could imagine. It would probably take me a day or so to move completely out of the way.”

You see how difficult Today is to work with?

“What about yesterday?” I ask. “I was happier then. The book still needed one last day of work. There was still hope for it. Life was all possibility! Couldn’t I have another taste of that?”

“I wouldn’t bother,” I am told. “It will taste like stale beer.  But if you want, here you go.”

He’s right, of course. At least he isn’t smug about it. I will say that about Today: He’s strangely generous in his own way. He answers every question promptly. He gives you all the room you need. I do appreciate that. It’s good to have someone around who asks nothing of you, especially when you already ask so much of yourself.

For instance, he never asks if something is finished. He just hangs around while you work. I honestly don’t think he would know the difference between a first sentence and a last sentence. This is how he is. It makes it impossible to brag or complain about anything with him. He wouldn’t understand it even if you tried, and believe me I have.

And what was I saying when I started this? I can’t remember now. No matter. I have to admit that Today is looking a little better now that this is done.

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