How to Write a Publishable Personal Essay
By Erika hoffman
I’ve sold my personal essays to anthologies, magazines, ezines, and newspapers over 450 times. Some are inspirational. Many are humorous. Several are informative. Others are educational or travel oriented. I’ve even sold a few to religious magazines although I’m not overly religious. Once I sold a piece about penning Christmas letters to Australian Catholics; the Jesuit priests didn’t care I’m not Catholic nor have I stepped foot in Australia. They liked the advice I was giving. Markets are everywhere. Be persistent in submitting. Yet, first know what you are doing when you create your piece.
Below is a listicle on how to create a composition that will catch and keep an editor’s attention.
Crown your essay with a catchy title regardless of whether the editor might change it upon acceptance. Often, my stories in Chicken Soup for the Soul don’t keep the titles with which I christened them for a myriad of reasons yet the title caught the assistant editor’s attention. The very first piece I sold them over ten years ago, I entitled “Lessons from a Bitch.” It was about what my daughter learned about life from having a female golden retriever for eight years, until the dog passed.
Talk about one event or incident or one subject. Only one. This isn’t a ship’s log or a diary.
Self-deprecate. I’ve even called one piece of mine “I Do Dumb Things.” This appeared recently in a new series called The Bad Day Books. Except for narcissists, everyone relates to doing dumb things.
If possible, insert a fact or two or more that are informative without being didactic or esoteric. Add something the average person may not know but wishes he/she did after learning it and now feels smarter knowing it. Not long ago, I submitted a story for an anthology seeking foolhardy escapades. I told how I explored the Parisian catacombs, which were originally quarries that supplied mined gypsum and limestone used in creating the Louvre and Notre Dame. Betcha most folks don’t know that tidbit about the ossuaries under the ground of the City of Light!
Use dialogue. It breaks up the narrative and makes you human. You don’t sound like some smart-alecky, pompous scrivener when you replicate everyman’s conversation.
Include some suspense or surprise. Make the reader curious to learn the outcome. Every piece of great literature does this, not just genre mysteries.
Never saturate a piece with foreign vocabulary or la-de-da words and yet everyone likes to learn the etymology of everyday words or common idioms or culinary offerings. (Did you know that tiramisu means “pick-me-up” in Italian? Because they flavor the dessert with espresso.)
Use humor. Even a serious poignant piece benefits from a sprinkle of funny here and there. The direst of events usually has a light moment—somewhere. I enjoy 48 Hours. I like to intuit what has happened before I’m told whether the defendant is guilty or not. Even among the most gruesome descriptions of murders and mayhem, there is usually something said by the narrators, or a tone used by someone interviewed that lightens the mood— for a second.
Tie up the package. The ending should always circle back to the beginning without being a verbatim rehash of the original wording. The finale should remind the reader of what the story was about without summarizing it.
Never talk down to your readers. Make them feel like your confidantes or conversational buddies or someone you’re going to share time and space with, like a lab partner in Chemistry
Go to Review on your computer and find “Read Aloud.” Listen without writing down anything. How does it sound coming from another voice other than your own? If you’re pleased, great. If not, go back and iron out the clumsy or nebulous verbiage.
Then submit. Submit to several venues if your topic suits their editorial calendars.
Now forget about it. Go on to your next project. You’re on a roll!
Erika Hoffman began penning her stories, essays, and articles fourteen years ago. To date, she has succeeded over 460 times getting them published. In addition, small traditional publishers printed her two novels. Her latest non-fiction stories are featured in Randell Jones’s anthologies: Lost and Found; Sooner or Later: Now or Never. The first volume of a new series called Bad Day Books has included two of her tales. The Old Schoolhouse Magazine regularly prints her educational articles. Erika’s stories continue to find a home at THEMA. The Chatham News, her local newspaper welcomes her travel columns such as her recent one called Paris is always a good idea.